The writings of some random dude on the internet
They told me I must choose between,
The grounded earth or skies unseen.
A tree to stand, strong and tall,
Or wings to fly, risk the fall.
But roots can stretch and wings can rest,
Both can grow within one chest.
For who’s to say the wind and stone,
Cannot live in flesh and bone?
Depression can suck.
It makes you feel like you don’t want to do anything.
It makes you feel like you are just going through the motions.
It can be hard.
It can be real hard.
People say to stay active and do things and whatnot.
Sometimes, though, it can be hard to be motivated when feeling depressed.
Grief sucks.
Loss sucks.
It sucks losing someone.
It sucks losing a pet.
It sucks losing a friend.
It sucks losing family.
I know loss is a part of life.
It still is hard.
When you were close to someone, losing them really sucks.
You lose a big part of your life when you lose them.
I know that life has to go on.
I know that life has to move forward.
Life can only move forward.
But losing someone still hurts.
They will be a part of your memory.
It has been 6 years since you’ve been gone.
Still cannot believe it.
You were gone too soon.
You left us too fast.
You were too young.
You still had lots of life ahead of you.
It is not fair.
It’s not fair you were taken away from us.
Life had been hard without you.
I think about you everyday.
Since you left us, we’ve lost a lot more.
I wish you were still here.
You’d know what to say.
It has been hard, dealing with all this loss, this grief.
I have made some accomplishments in life since you left.
I know you would have been proud.
I am proud, too, of myself.
It still feels empty.
I feel a sense of hollowness, emptiness.
I feel numb.
They say life gets better as time goes on.
I don’t know how true that is.
It has been 6 years, and it feels like 16 years.
These past few years have been awful for me.
I hope it gets better.
I want things to get better.
Trauma can suck.
It can happen from anything devasting.
It can happen from loss to a bad event to an attack.
It can suck a lot.
And the effects of the trauma can remain months or even years after.
It can change you.
It can change you emotionally and mentally and even physically.
Grief can feel like a mental weight.
It can weigh down on you.
It can feel like a burden.
It can affect your mental health.
It can affect your emotions negatively.
It feels heavy.
April used to be a month of joy.
It was a month of greatness.
It was a month of change.
It was a month of new beginnings.
Spring was on its way.
Flowers were blooming.
Plants were getting a new life.
But 6 years ago, that all changed.
After losing one of my loved ones, April has become a depressing time for me.
It is a month I dread.
It makes me sad.
This week will be 6 years since someone close to me passed away.
It has been hard.
It’s been very hard.
And since they passed away, I experienced a few more losses over the years.
So much loss has happened to me in the past 6 years.
And it all just feels heavy sometimes.
Emotionally heavy.
It can weigh on me mentally.
I try to be positive.
I try to move forward.
It can be hard sometimes.
It can be hard to be positive.
And people sometimes don’t understand.
Grief and loss can affect you negatively.
They can be traumatic.
And experiencing multiple losses in a short period of time, that can weigh on you mentally.
Also emotionally.
A light drifts through the midnight haze,
A ghost of gold in silver maze.
It calls the lost, it calms the weak,
It hums a song no lips could speak.
Through mist and shadow, there it glows,
A silent guide where no one knows.
And those who follow, hearts unchained,
Will find the path the dark has claimed.
The waves return, as waves must do,
To kiss the shore and bid adieu.
The rocks, unmoved, yet worn so thin,
Hold every tale the tides bring in.
A sailor’s song, a mermaid’s wail,
A shipwreck lost within the gale.
The sea remembers, never sleeps,
It carries dreams the silence keeps.